How to Bear Fruit in the Midst of Your Marriage Trials

How To Bear Fruit in the Midst of Marriage Trials

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The Mission of Marriage

Being married is both joyous and trying. I’ve only been married a little over six months. However, I can definitely say I’ve felt both ways at some point or another (and this is just the beginning).  During my devotional time, I came across a wonderful scripture in Romans. I wanted to share this verse with you all because it can encourage us to bear fruit in the midst of our marriage trials.

“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love” Romans 5:3-5 (NLT).

This scripture can be applied to a multitude of areas, but it definitely hit home for me in the area of marriage. The Bible teaches us that marriage was created by God, for His glory. In The Meaning of Marriage, Tim Keller says “What marriage is for: It is a way for two spiritual friends to help each other on their journey to become the persons God designed them to be”. Marriage is a beautiful place to commune and find many types of love. However, the main mission of marriage is for you and your spouse to become more like Christ through your everyday trials and triumphs.

The main mission of marriage is for you and your spouse to become more like Christ through your everyday trials and triumphs. Click To Tweet
Faithful Through the Frustration

In this scripture three points stuck out to me that I wanted to share with you all. I hope these will remind you to have faith in our God amid seasons of discontentment.

  • Trials help us develop endurance
  • Endurance develops strength of character
  • Character strengthens our hope of salvation
Trials help us develop endurance

When you marry your spouse you make a covenant before God to stick it out til death do you part. Hopefully, between death and I do you’ll both love deeply, grow in Christ, and share beautiful memories. However, it’s not always flowers and sunshine, there will be hardships and some heartache.

When you marry your spouse you make a covenant before God to stick it out til death do you part. Click To Tweet

Think of marriage like a marathon. A marathon takes a lot of endurance, 26.2 miles of endurance to be exact. When we surrender our marriage to the Lord, we open our relationship to his divine leadership, help, and love. “Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken” Psalm 55:22 (NIV). When you have the support of our mighty God behind you there is nothing you and your spouse cannot face. Remeber without the test there is no testimony!

If you find yourself in the middle of a storm or a rut, think about your relationship. Not your relationship with your spouse, but your relationship with the Lord. Is God and his will your #1 priority? Are you both setting aside time daily to connect with our heavenly father? Are you trying to work out your problems on your own, or are you crying out to the Lord to deliver you from all your troubles, Psalm 34:17 (NIV). In the face of marital difficulties, God will give you both everything you need to persevere, and with perseverance comes fortitude.  

endurance develops strength of character

When we accept that Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins and believe he is Lord in our hearts, God gifts us with the Holy Spirit! However, it is up to us whether we will rely on the Holy Spirit or our flesh to help us make decisions. If we depend on the Holy Spirit’s guidance we will eventually produce the fruits of the spirit.

“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things” Galatians 5:22-23 (NLT).

As we go through this life and lean on the Lord to guide us and strengthen us we will develop a spiritual tolerance. With that spiritual tolerance comes strength, courage, and deeply ingrained fruits. We will never stop being tempted to sin, but with a strong character and the help of God we can stand firm and not be easily shaken. There will be times in our relationships when it’s hard to turn the other cheek, swallow our pride, forgive, and even love. But I encourage you to press into God and weather the storms. Not only will you look more like Christ, but your faith should be strengthened, because of everything the Lord has brought you through. As we grow and withstand this life, we can expect even greater blessings in our next life with our Lord.

character strengthens our hope of salvation

As we are transformed by the Holy Spirit and become a new creation in Christ, we can have great hope in our salvation. But we don’t only have hope, we have an assurance. Through our faith in Christ Jesus, we will have abundant, eternal life.

1 Peter 1:8-9 (NLT).

Following God and his will in our lives and our relationships leads us to become the people God destined us to be. When we accepted Jesus as Lord we became a new creation in Him, but there is still much work to be done on our parts. As God walks alongside us through everything he will take notice of our hearts. Through your faith in him, you will be forever changed. This change is the evidence of your faith, to Him and to others. And because you have been made new you can rest assured of God’s promises.

“So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world” 1 Peter 1:6-7 (NLT).

For Better or for Worse…

Marriage is beautiful, and it is also telling. The intimate relationships we have with our significant others will reveal the worst in us, and the best in us if we let it. Let’s have faith in God to get us through the rough patches, and rejoice through the pain. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV).

Marriage is beautiful, and it is also telling. The intimate relationships we have with our significant others will reveal the worst in us, and the best in us if we let it. Click To Tweet

I have faith that the Holy Spirit will change our hearts for the better as we deepen our marriage covenant and trust in God. We can delight in God’s love and promises because he is so good! It is my hope that you and your husband will keep God at the center of your marriage and in turn bear much fruit. With his help, we are strong, fearless, and filled with his peace.

Questions to think about:

Is God the center of my marriage?

Have I been trying to handle the trials in my marriage without God? If so, how can I invite him into my life?

Am I allowing the Holy Spirit to lead me or my flesh?

Can I see the fruits of the Spirit strengthening in my life? If so which ones?

How are your relationship trials growing your faith?

Answer in the comments or reflect in your quiet time. And don’t forget to subscribe to my e-mail list to stay in the loop!

With lots of love,

Jazmen Johnson


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