Marriage Problems Or God Problems? 5 Ways to Surrender Your Marriage to God.

A Reality Check

“Most of the problems we experience in marriage stem from a lack of relationship with God, which means they are not really marriage problems. They’re God problems.” — Francis Chan and Lisa Chan, You and Me Forever: Marriage in Light of Eternity Devotional from YouVersion. Interested in You and Me Forever: Marriage in Light of Eternity, click here.

This quote from my daily devotional hit me like a ton of bricks! If I’m being completely honest here…I haven’t been focusing on the Lord. Between being a newlywed, full-time Medical Laboratory Scientist (MLS), new blogger, friend, daughter, and my many other roles I can definitely say that God’s been getting my leftovers. And unfortunately, I’ve seen the fruitlessness of living a life not truly focused on God.  It’s so easy for all of us to fall into cycles of overemphasizing other seemingly important areas of our lives. However, our God deserves to be put first over everything, and rightfully so.

For great is the Lord. He is to be given much praise. And He is to be honored with fear more than all gods” 1 Chronicles 16:25 (NLV).

My marriage, my problem…or is it?

When I’m having a problem in my marriage, my natural reaction is to try to remedy the problem on my own. However, when we do this, we’re telling the Lord that we don’t need Him. When we entrust our lives to the Lord and release our faith, it is then and only then that God can get to work on our behalf. We all have moments in our marriage when we’re not loving one another, arguing til we’re blue in the face, and disagreeing over any and everything. And it is in these moments that we must trust Him to fight our battles and be our strength. God can make the impossible, possible and He’ll show up for us, if we let Him.  God can make the impossible, possible and He'll show up for us, if we let Him. Click To Tweet

 

5 ways to Surrender Your Marriage to the Lord:

So how do we submit to the Lord? Below I’ve put together a list of five ways to turn your marriage over to the Father. When we do this we are liberating our marriage from any and every unfavorable situation.

1. Trust

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NLT). We must trust that God is good, and that He only wants His best for us. When we show God we trust Him by allowing Him to fight our battles for us, the spoils of war will always be sweet. We may not always see what God is up to, but have confidence that all the marital problems you and your spouse experience will be worked together for good.                                                      

2. release your faitH

“I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours” Mark 11:24 (NLT). God gave us free will, so we must use it. When we pray for God’s will to be done in our lives we are releasing our faith. Pray fiercely for God to take hold of your heart and your life, and see him work on your behalf in amazing ways. God can turn all situations around, mend any heartache, and breathe new life into your relationship if we allow Him.

3. READ God’s Word

“As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him” Psalm 18:30 (NIV). There are many wisdom-filled lessons on marriage that can be found within the Bible. Read God’s word, and seek His wisdom. Search for scripture on how to be an obedient servant. Discover the principles of a Proverbs 31 woman. When the Lord is quiet in our hearts look for your next step within the good book. We will find essential truths and lessons for our lives in His word. 

4. Serve in Love

“Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. 10 Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other” Romans 12:9-10 (NLT). It’s easy to serve your spouse when the warm, fuzzy feelings of romantic love are floating about. However, the true test begins when the butterflies fade. Choosing to love and serve your spouse can be hard, but do it anyways. Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, served tirelessly his entire life; we are called to be Christ-like in character. When you live to serve others, you may just be surprised at the results. 

5. Be Patient

The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him” Lamentations 3:25 (NKJV). God’s timing is always perfect. When we’re unsure of what He is doing in our lives, in our situations, in our marriage we must trust in His goodness. God has our best interest at heart, and even we we cannot see it, He is working things out in His timing. Learning to have patience in the Lord will also teach you to have patience with yourself and your partner. Bearing the fruit of patience is a beautiful sign of a growing spirit. 

 

I pray that these fives ways to surrender your marriage to the Lord will be helpful to you and your spouse. When you both are ready I hope you will say a prayer together to give your marriage to Him for His glory.

A Prayer to Give your marriage to the lord

Dear Lord,

We were married before you and vowed to glorify you with our holy union. However, we’ve focused too heavily on ourselves and not enough on you. We’ve tried to control our marriage under the guise of perfecting it, but God only you are in control. You are the only place perfection can be found. Lord we release our marriage to you, for it is a beautiful burden we cannot carry on our own. We lay our marriage down to seek you first, because only in you can we find true, everlasting love. Lord we give you authority over our lives and our relationship. We worship you, we trust you, we love you. In Jesus name we pray.

Amen!

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Many Blessing,

Jazmen Johnson

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12 thoughts on “Marriage Problems Or God Problems? 5 Ways to Surrender Your Marriage to God.

    1. Jazmen

      Thanks so much, I had to do this myself. Although I still struggle to let go and let God, it’s getting easier.

  1. So beautiful. Ahh…the bliss of a surrendered marriage…Only God can help two people truly become and love each other with His love. You were such a beautiful bride. I love the colors in your post/blog

    1. Jazmen

      Thanks so much, that day was such a dream come true! And you are so right, God has to be the foundation for every marriage, because he created all things for His purpose.

  2. BEing patient and serving in love! So difficult to practice especially when youre upset with each other but A quick prayer in that moment enables us to overcome our flesh with the help of the Holy Spirit! Thanks for the reminder and the awesome verses!

    1. Jazmen

      You’re so welcome, happy you got something out of it! And I agree, easy principles to learn, but hard to walk out. Blessing <3

  3. These are truly wonderful tips for married couples when they are in a season of struggle. So often we can fall into the blame-game or try to fix the situations (our our spouse) ourselves. Thank you for these great tips. (You were a beautiful bride by the way!) God bless!

    1. Jazmen

      Thank you and you are so welcome! I’ve been working on using these strategies myself, happy I could share them. I hope couples use these tips to redeem their relationship during times of hardship.

  4. There aren’t enough clap emojis to capture my agreeance ! This was such a refreshing post, I think we too often forget how we ourselves began our marriage to Christ, rocky yet committed and just like that relationship took time the one we have with our spouse takes time but as long as we cultivate an attitude of prayer we are on the right track !

    1. Jazmen

      LOL, thank you so much! I agree 100%. As new Christians, we struggle, rebel, and learn so much. And our relationship with our spouse is no different. We must have love, grace, and patience with each other, just like Christ gives us.

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